I Am Addicted to Feeling Needed

Dear "I am addicted to feeling needed",

I hear you...In you there is this urge to seek those who are wounded. We want to rush in, wrap our hearts around others and make them feel better. Superficially we tell ourselves its all about them-the person we are intending to help. But the truth is-that's a lie.

When we find ourselves continually attracting the broken hearted, or the drug addicts, or the financially burdened-when we continually attract those who just cannot seem to get their lives together, there needs to be a moment of clarity in which we are able to step out of ourselves and see the big picture. It is necessary and quite possible that we embrace the gift of allowing, and "allow" our minds to see our lives as if we were watching it on the big screen, detached from the emotional strings of the circumstance.

Often the "addicted to feeling needed", complain about how hard they try to get others to change. They know in their hearts they are right and if so and so just did what they told them to do, so and so's life would change, and get better. The "addicted to feeling needed", tell themselves how good they are for sticking around. They find a sense of self worth by throwing themselves onto the hot coals of someone else's garbage. They believe they are martyrs for how hard they try to get others to get their lives on track. But, again, its all a lie.

When we have crossed that line, and have begun caring more about what others need and think, than what we need and think, we have gone too far. Never is it okay to care more about others needs than our own, to the point where we feel used, depressed, violated, unappreciated, guilty, or angry. If you are helping someone to the point where you have begun experiencing negative, toxic emotions by aiding someone, you are surely simply attracting more of those negative feelings into your life {vibrational energy}.

Okay...really hear through my words what I am trying to teach you. The best teachers are those who have experienced what it is they are trying to teach. I have been there. I have been addicted to feeling needed and to people pleasing. It sucks...let me help...

The only reason you were created was to feel joy. Joy, happiness, and peace are your birthright. But can you experience joy, and know that happiness is yours if you do not first love, and respect your own unique self?

Is it possible to attract positivity, if ones own self image is negative? It is not...

In order to be happy in this life, it is essential to become selfish...but not in a "Now I don't care about anyone else but me" spirit. Instead, when I say selfish I mean, learning to get quiet enough so that you can begin hearing your own voice-your own inner guide-your own spirit-your own vibrational energy.

If you are addicted to feeling needed, you are out of step with your creator-what made you you. You are out of vibrational frequency with positive energy. In you is a knowing...in you are the answers...in you is your truth, but you have been taught to "de-value" your self, and so you can no longer hear your own voice.

When you were little, perhaps you were ignored psychologically. Perhaps your caretakers put you down, or simply never showed up the way your soul needed it to. When we are taught that what we need is unimportant, we are taught that what others need and think is far more valuable than what we feel about ourselves. It then becomes nearly impossible to tune ourselves into our own inner positive vibration, because we were never taught to listen to our own self.

Out of step parents unaware to their own needs, create disharmony within children. Negativity is then transferred from parent to child, and unfairly children are programmed to be out of sync with who they truly are. Rather than be nurtured positively, and taught to stay in tune with who they are, children are abused, ignored, abandoned and thus grow under clouds of depression, anger, sadness, loneliness, despair, confusion, and self doubt. All these negative emotions create negative energy within the child, and so "love of self" is a foreign concept.

It was your parents job to help you honor "you". But if they didn't, chances are that is because they do not honor their true spirits. They may honor money, prestige, power, control, drugs, or manipulating others into doing what they want them to do...but that is not of "spirit". That is of the physical which is purely ego.

When I was addicted to feeling needed, I was looking to be validated for my good works. I did not know how to satisfy my own spirit by my own self praise. I did not know how to look within, and to connect with the fact that I, me-Lisa Champion {my birth name} was created by the same energy that created the heavens, and the oceans. I did not know that I was as important as every creature and any creature that walked the earth. I did not realize that keeping myself small, I did nothing to improve the world in which I live. I did not appreciate that my voice mattered, and that I could change the world, even the world of one person, for the better. I did not know then, that loving myself first was not selfish, in a bad way. I did not know that in order to truly love others, I first had to learn to honor and love my "self".

Being addicted to being needed means you are looking for worth in the sacrifices you make for others. It means you attract needy people for your own ego based needs.

The ego will lie to you and tell you you need to be better than everyone else. It will do all it can to keep you from truth. The truth is you are no more important nor are you any less important than anyone else. We are all equal.

The ego doesn't want you to embrace that knowledge because when you do, it dies.

The ego does not want to die. It wants to inflate itself, and will manipulate circumstances in which opportunities are created in where the ego gets to feel big. If you continually seek others who need you, your ego gets to complain, whine, yell, and pout over the sacrifices you have made for the sake of others.

What would happen if you let that all go? What would happen if you let someone fall instead of running to protect or save them? What would happen to your ego if it had no pity party to reign at? What would happen in your mind if you no longer had phone calls to make that consisted of you crying over how hard you try to be good and to help others?

If the rescuing stopped, where would the ego go?

If you are strong enough to see the truth in what I have written, you may be strong enough to handle letting go of rescuing others completely. You are the one with the problem. Your energy is attracting its vibrational match. Unless you change the energy within you, expect more of what you have been attracting thus far.

When you learn to see how manipulating your need to be needed is, you will understand that that is why you keep getting manipulated. Your rescuing is manipulating ego praise and faulty self worth from others. And your manipulating will attract manipulators. Its that simple. And it is the law of attraction. What you give out you always get back.

If you want love, first be love.

If you want peace, first be peace.

If you want generosity, be generous.

If you want to be praised, praise.

If you want to be loved for who you are, then love who you are.

If you want to be accepted, first accept who you are.

If you want positivity, be positive.

If you do not want to be needed, stop needing.

How to Make The Law of Attraction Work For You

In order to have the Law of Attraction work for you, you must first design your desires.

The Law of Attraction will never fail. If you are insecure, expect situations to show up that will reinforce that which you focus upon. If you focus on having a big belly, expect to see beautiful tiny waists about you throughout your days to help remind you of how large your waist is. You will attract this form of "reminding" simply by staying tuned into what you do not have.

If you want a smaller waist line, then you first must see yourself in a smaller waist size. You must desire having a smaller waist to the point where you can feel what it feels like to be slimmer and more tone. When you do this, the law of attraction will then attract to you situations, people and even foods into your consciousness that will help you get what you desire. But if instead you focus on what you don't want, you get more of what you don't want. The trick is to focus upon what you do want....and to create enough energy about feeling good about what you do want, that the law of attraction has an easier time matching you up with your desires.

The energy you exude is the only energy that can come back to you. Much like a bank account in which you can only expect to receive what you have deposited, so to is it with energy.

If you are a complainer, expect to find things to complain about. People will disappoint you. You will hit every red traffic light. Your boss will pass you over when it is time to promote employees, and yes....maybe your spouse may even cheat on you.

If you are a manipulator, expect to feel manipulated, and expect to be manipulated.

If you are greedy, expect to find reasons not to be giving, and for others to not give to you.

If you expect to be given to, then you must understand it is you who must find the energy within you to be giving.

If you want to be understood, first seek to understand.

When your energy is one that is giving and is generous, then the vibrations of energy you put out into the world will need to find vibrational matches for that giving. In your physical place, you can then rest in knowing that your prosperity is coming. The laws that govern the universe cannot work any other way. We all match whatever vibration we are sending out.

My life has been dedicated to helping others find ways to "know their own minds". My website, http://www.healingtheselfwell.com is my story.

My life has been about an unfolding. My life and all its troubles is a factual representation of the law of attraction. What was put into me through childhood programming is what was coming out of me. When my thoughts about the world were forming did I know it was faulty programming? No of course not. I was a child, and I was innocent.

The negative energy that lived in my parents, they unknowingly breathed into me. And as i ventured out into life, I breathed out only what was deposited into me. I however was unaware consciously that this was happening.

On my journey, and through the book I wrote, "The Road Back To Me", I have discovered that for me, I had to go back and unravel what had been done to me as a child. I had to understand completely and fully where my thoughts originated and why they were there. I could not just close my eyes and want things to be better. I needed to know why I was where I was. For me I needed to completely wipe the slate clean and start over.

It is eleven years since the first time my ex husband left. While I thought I was smart just two months ago, I am thrilled in knowing I was wrong. Okay, maybe I was pretty smart a few months ago, and for sure I am smarter and wiser than I was eleven years ago, but today I know I am certainly even smarter than I was 8 weeks ago.

You see, I am still growing. I am still learning. And I feel in my spirit the knowing that the best is yet to come. I get it. It was necessary for me to learn how to detangle all my heart, so that I could be effective in helping others detangle their sorrows. In my heart it was my greatest desire to help others, and true to the law of attraction, in my work this is precisely what I have been doing. I simply help others detangle the woes that are swirling in their heads in the earnest hope of helping them find clarity so that they can begin choosing wiser thoughts and thus begin creating more meaningful and fulfilling lives.

But folks, my desires are changing. True it will always be my hearts desire to help souls wherever I go, but I cannot help but feel it is time to up the anty.

I have been wanting to help others for so long. But now I want more...I desire to travel. I desire to speak to large crowds of people who need to be shown a way out of their confusion. I desire to have more money in order to be able to see and appreciate this planets beauty. I desire to take my children on my trips and to infuse them with the same love I have for nature and the awesomeness of its authenticity. I desire to have so much money that I can drive the car of my dreams, live in the homes I see myself in, and to have money enough to secure my children's financial future as well as mine. I desire money because I know that this physical place our physical bodies exist in requires this paper in order to acquire the things I desire of the physical.

Its coming...I can feel it...but I also know that my attitude towards money must be in alignment with what I desire.

For me to desire lots of money so that I can travel, I must align myself with what it feels like to have so much money that it feels as if the money has already shown up. That means being more giving. That means seeking ways in which to release money so that I can experience what it feels like to have so much money that there is nothing to worry about. That means I must release all my worries about money and act and feel as if what I want I already have.

I have already begun.

When I am asked to donate to a cause, I give freely. When the veteran that stands outside of Waldbaums is handing out his poppies looking for a donation, I always stop my car and stick some rolled up cash into his can. When it comes time to pay my bills, I do so with a grateful heart. I am happy I have the money to keep that company in business. When my daughter asks for a new pair of shoes, and I feel she is deserving of them, I do so happily. When I see a person in need, I stop and give them cash releasing my need to feel like I can't afford to be giving. Because the law of attraction is working I now know that in order to have my physical life be a manifestation of what I truly want, I first must conceive it, focus up on it, and feel as if what I want, is...already....

Life is awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Osama Bin Laden and The Law of Attraction

What we think we create. If I want a slice of pizza, I first must feel a sense for that slice of pizza. Then thoughts are born to help me get the slice of pizza I am feeling I want to eat. The vibrations within me set off a series of events that help me get from what I am feeling and thinking, into actions and physical behaviors that help me satisfy that thing I was thinking about. In this case it is a slice of pizza.

The Law of Attraction never fails. What I want and focus on I always get. If I want a slice of pizza and focus my thoughts and energy upon that want, I will find myself performing actions that will bring me into alignment with what needs to take place to get me to that slice of pizza.

Taking this concept into account, I would like you to think about how the Law of Attraction can be used in a negative way.

Osama Bin Laden was a man whose mind was consumed by the need to harm others. In his minds eye lived desires to destroy anyone who opposed his ideals. In him was energy of destruction. His thoughts focused upon death, and while his physical body walked this planet, destructive energy flowed through him. His distorted perception of his purpose infused him so, he was able to convince others to walk with him in his malicious energy, to continue to carry out terror on our planet. As his thoughts of hate grew, so did his hateful energy. As his energy of hate grew, it infected those around him. The Law of Attraction is as true for malicious intent as it is for holy intent. It is in the eye of the beholder that determines distinction. In Osama Bin Laden's mind, his purpose was holy.

What we think we create. If he believed in what he was thinking, then it was his destiny to create the terror he inflicted.

His death he attracted unto himself.

The fear he found himself shroud in by needing to stay hidden in Pakistan, he brought to himself.

The terror that lived in his heart, because there was a bounty on his head, he brought to himself.

What Osama Bin Laden thought about he created in his lifetime, as well as in his death.

The good news is that because of Osama Bin Laden's, and because of the terror they create through the Law of Attraction, those of us whose intent is to spread love in the peaceful sense, have opportunities to show empathy, support, kindness and compassion to others and in return stir the pot of The Law of Attraction knowing we are sewing seeds of goodness in our own spiritual gardens.

Lady Gaga And The Law of Attraction

I just finished watching Lady Gaga on a quick video clip. In it she was giving the American Idol contestants pointers. While watching Lady Gaga I was struck by the intensity of her focus. Watching Lady Gaga was like witnessing a laser hone in on its subject.

In her eyes, in her voice and in the way she moved her body, I could tell Lady Gaga was "tuned" into not only her own vibrational enormity, but to the contestants she was trying to coach as well.

She urged them to "feel" the words and to perform the story behind the words. In essence, what she was asking them to do was to come into "alignment" with the energy of the song, in hopes that that energy would transform their talents from good, to extraordinary.

My mind could not help but be impressed with Lady Gaga's innate ability to be true to herself and to the energy that flows through her. She is unabashed by the opinions of others and devours her instincts. She is open to what is and is blessed in her allowing of energy transference; meaning that Lady Gaga knows who she is, and rather than minimize or tone that which she is, she is a wide open faucet that is accepting of the energy that she is; source energy; divinity.

For some people the Law of Attraction is just a simple phrase. It is likened to Karma; do unto others as you would want others to do unto you. Often I have heard less than aware minds use the phrase as freely as one would say "How are you?", never earnestly concerned about how the person they asked the question truly was.

But the Law of Attraction is far more powerful and real and intense than most realize. If you look at the most public of figures today; the ones that make the headlines, and if you follow their history what you will see is the unfolding of the power of The Law of Attraction.

Lady Gaga is now known all over the world. In a few short years she has raced to the top of the music industry in record speed. How can this be? How can someone so young be so successful in such a short amount of time?

Lady Gaga is not from another planet. She does not have famous influential parents. So what is it that Lady Gaga possesses that most of us do not.

Lady Gaga is in touch with what makes her who she is. Who she is is a visual performer. Who she is is a creative soul. Who she is is an individualist. Who she is is a soul in love with her own talents. Who she is is a woman who is in flow with the energy that has created her. Who she is is someone who is allowing that energy to flow through every cell and every thought and every action in her body. She is a manifestation of source energy, or as some others would choose to call divinity.

Her passion is not selfish or self serving. She is a performer who wishes us all to be who we are, and to embrace who we were born to be.

This conservative yet open minded single mother of three, has nothing but admiration and appreciation for the embodiment that Lady Gaga is. For those brave enough to open their minds and to see past the wigs and thick feline stenciled eyeliner, you will be enlightened by her authentic representation of source energy, divinity, awareness, and energy alignment.

Vibrations

It is said that each of us has a certain vibration. When we say that we do or do not like the "vibe"of someone we know, we are referring to the energy that person is giving off. We know that energy can be either positive or negative. If we believe this to be true, then it is fair to say that energy, which can be determined through vibrations can be either positive or negative. We know that we are energy beings, whose musculoskeletal systems and cardiac rhythms are powered by electrically charged minerals in our bodies. And so we can safely assume that we are in fact "energy beings" who carry with us a certain vibrational field.

What is within us will dictate what is outside of us. If our thoughts are negative, then it is correct to assume that what is happening in our "real time" is going to be negative. If the eyes through which I view my world are tainted by anger, resentment, self pity, worry, obsession, guilt or addiction, then I will only be able to "see" those things in my environment which support what I am feeling inside.

If a man is angry at his wife, his eyes will not see the time she put into making him a meal. His internal dialogue will effect how he perceives his reality and he will only see that she did not remember to put his favorite fork beside his full dinner plate.

If a woman is resenting her husband, she will not see that his working overtime is for the vacation he has planned for her at the end of the month. Her "feelings" will taint her perception and she will only feel slighted when he finally walks through the front door after a long tedious day of work.

Feelings can be controlled. But far too often we do not use the ability we humans have to force our "feelings" to work for us.

Being happy, grateful, peaceful, and content are not emotions that just show up.

In order to be happy, grateful and content, we must decide to be so and change our vibrations from within.

It is possible to cause our vibrational energy to be positive and to override any impulse to be negative. All we have to do is choose what thoughts our minds want to hold, and then fixate on feeling good.

Daydreaming about feeling good causes the vibrational energies inside of us to shift. And whenever we shift our vibrational energy from one of sadness to joy, we then effect the world at large by adding to its positive energy field.

At our core is a perfect positive energy source. At any time we can tap into that source and connect with all that is good in this world. But we cannot unless we choose to do so...

If you close your eyes and imagine everything you ever wanted, your energy will become more positive and when it does, you force the universe to align with your desires.

The opposite is also true. If you are hopeless, you will draw from the universe all that is hopeless and what you think about and what you feel will in fact show up.

The key to happiness is to be happiness...right here and right now...

Divorce: How Not To Get Divorced

If you've never been through the horror of a divorce, you cannot know the depths of confusion one must travel through while navigating along such a turbulent path. Often, it is not until you have actually come through to the other side, that you begin to comprehend just how lost you were while traveling. In the moment, our mind does wonders at justifying behaviors, and even thoughts. Our perception so clouded with doubt, despair, the fear of the unknown, and grief, we lose the ability to step out of ourselves and look in. So burdened with anxiety, it is nearly impossible to look up, let alone look in. Our eyes barely able to keep focus what stands 2ft before us, survival is our goal.

If you never want to feel these dark depths, then either don't ever get married, or learn a few emotional tricks before you do.

Marriage is supposed to be about love. Love is supposed to be about kindness, patience, selflessness, partnership, cooperation, and courage. Marriage is about "we" not "I"...........but that is not to say being a "we" replaces being an "I". One must never lose ones own self to anyone or anything.

The problem is, people enter marriage not knowing who they are as an "I". They have yet to discover who they truly are. Not knowing where they begin, what their boundaries are, what they will and will not tolerate, people enter marriages assuming everything is going to work out. More than half of marriages end in divorce, so what's up???

I admit that when I got married at 23, I had no idea who I was. I loved my husband with the knowledge I had had about love. In my mind love meant doing and doing and doing and doing, and never receiving. Codependency was my model for marriage, and so yes, eventually my marriage, like so many others ended in divorce.

The ket to not getting divorced, is found in learning to fall in love with ourselves first.

When we fall in love with the "self" first, we begin to understand that we are enough. There is no longer a need to prove our worth to anyone, and what others think of us is no longer a priority. When this emotional shift occurs in us, the hold our ego had on us, begins to fade.

When ego begins to loosen, it is then much easier for us to slip into a "we" mentality. We no longer need to struggle for power, whine for attention, or pout about not getting our way. We do for our spouse because we want to and not because we are trying to manipulate a response out of them.

So if you don't want to get divorced, first unite with your own "self". Intellectually realize your souls worth. Know in your gut, you are enough, and then enjoy the splendors of what it is to love from your soul.

When The Ones We Love-Hurt Us

Cycles...The world is full of cycles.

If when you were three years old, you interpreted your relationship with your mother or father as one in which you found yourself "feeling" unseen, chances are that feeling stayed with you. And as you grew, if that "hunch" or "feeling" was not diminished, chances are you found your brain seeking situations outside of you to validate that "hunch" or "feeling". Maybe it was the way mommy looked at your baby brother, and didn't look at you. Maybe it was when daddy took your older sister to the dentist and left you behind at home. Maybe it was the time you fell off your bike and no one noticed.

Cycles...If your mind got stuck on a painful thought, it is highly likely that inside of you you recycled that thought over and over.

As you ran through the cycles in your mind, emotions were being stirred up. These emotions then aligned themselves with the thoughts you were feeling.

Thoughts always couple emotions...

The problem is we don't always see things clearly when things are actually happening in real time.

Perception is crucial.

Let's say you were left to stay home one afternoon when your father took your sister to the dentist...At the time, you may have interpreted this act as one that was being done against you. In your mind, because of your interpretation of the situation, you then attached a negative emotion to it.

But was it valid?

What if your sister and father were going out to pick out a birthday gift for you? What if your sister was having trouble at school and the situation was serious? What if your father was picking out a new baseball glove for you? Would this change your perception? And wouldn't it have changed your emotional attachment to it?

The ego tends to make all that is, about itself. This is debilitating to us as individuals, to us as families and to us as a society as a whole.

But when we are small, and we are just learning about our world and our place in it, it is impossible to separate ourselves from the grips of our ego.

Our best shot would have been found in having been born to parents without ego's; parents who had done their spiritual work, and who understood that it is possible to be in the world and not of the world. Mothers whose interests were not found in punishing her hard working husband for working late, or in fathers who appreciated how hard his wife worked. Parents who understood that love was ego-less...That love was about lifting their partners up, and not tearing them down.

But the truth is our parents were flawed, wounded, and found themselves thinking they were in love, when in fact they were "in-control" mode. Many of our fathers married our mothers, because they wanted mothers themselves, and many of our mothers married our fathers because they wanted father.

Whatever it was that our parents didn't get in childhood, our parents married one another, hoping they could control whatever that "emotional fix" was out of the other.

Whether it was validation, appreciation, visibility or worthiness, most of our parents married from places of wounded-ness rather than from wholeness..

And so the cycle continues..

Until one day, one special day, our minds awake, find a blog like this one, or a book, or a person, who in some way helps reveal the cycle to us..

And when that day arrives, our new life begins.

Thank You For Your Posts

I am writing this entry to say "thank you". Many of you have been commenting to my blog, and for some odd reason, I have not been getting notified when you have. So from my heart, I am sorry.

I started writing with one intent; to help, to inspire, and to give hope to those struggling with emotional binds that tie them.

Emotional ties, are like nooses around the necks of our own spirits. They are ties no one else can see, yet we are strangling from. It is a lonely, frustrating existence, to be emotionally wounded, and to have no where to turn. I know, because for decades that wounded soul was I.

In response to the most prevalent sentiments shared in your comments, I offer you these words of advice. To my friend "anonymous" who is compelled to help her friend who is a complete enabler and who is destroying the rest of her family with her inability to take responsibility for her role as "parent", and thus is reinforcing her own children's inability to be self responsible, I commend you on your intuition as well as clarity. You are right. Your friend is causing deep wounds, as well as crippling her children. It is unfortunate. It is unacceptable, but it is nonetheless reality.

Our places in this world, in my opinion is rooted in learning. In learning, we grow. And this gained knowledge is not a gift we are too keep all to ourselves. Wisdom is meant to be shared.

I believe you are far wiser than your friend. And I believe your friend knows this to be true. You my darling still have work to do.

Caring, praying, inspiring, and pulling for others is not the same as enabling them. When we feel so intensely about helping others, to the point where our focus shifts, and we no longer worry more about our happiness...we have crossed the line.

You my dear are meant to be happy...that is your birthright...and if you are losing your ability to enjoy life because of your worry for others, you are diminishing your capacity to truly help...

Make the best of yourself. Take all the energy you have been directing towards helping others who are not interested in helping themselves, and pour it into you...Become magnificent....Own your happiness...Own your beauty...Own your compassion and take your lessons out into the world with the knowing that you can only inspire the truly hungry...

You will find your way...and others who might benefit from your intuition and gift of discernment will naturally find you...

Attract the hungry, rather than trying to feed the overfed...

And when you do, you join me on my vision...You help change the world one mind at a time...

Thanks for writing...

Lisa

The World's Psychic Disease

The world is suffering from a psychic disease. The psychic disease is a collective one. It reflects the disease that is found in the false self, or the ego of man.

The ego represents all the things in us we do not want to see. It is shielded by veils of criticism, judgement, anger, violence, helplessness, victimization, manipulation, obsession, impulsivity, and denial. It is the reason we repress, hide, swallow and toss in the emotional juices of panic and anxiety.

Life exists within vibrational fields. We acknowledge "vibes" people give off, but rarely question our own.

We project and scarcely look within and concede to the inclination of "choice".

Although animals, we are not primates. Within the human mind exists a consciousness which is linked to freedom of choice.

Surrounded are we by polarities; the negative and the positive. The mind has the ability to choose which vibration it marries.

Who are you? Beneath your role as mother or father, boss, or employee, friend, or clergyman, who are you?

Do you manage the workings of your inner mind, or is your mind imprisoned by the illusions of the collective?

Society has man giving into fear. We are taught to distrust our own mind, We are conditioned since birth to go against our nature..which is in perfect harmony with the breath of the universe.

We are as a rose is.

But instead we have been lied to. We have been taught we cannot trust others, their minds, their choices, their intentions. Our childhoods tainted by fright.

We are raised in fear.

This fear, collectively has us fighting wars, hating one another, competing with our fellow man, lying, deceiving, and cheating other souls. The distrust we project, represents the distrust we have of our own minds. We judge others as we judge our selves.

A fearful society is a controllable one.

Harmony is free...

Fear is priceless...

To change the world, we must first change the world we live in; our SELF. The self is our world and the collective self is the universe.

There can be no change "out there" until there is a shift within the man, The false self; the ego must die. Birth must be given to consciousness. Consciousness is the place in our minds where peace sits. It is the harmony in us that beats with the churning of the oceans and rising of the sun. The sun does not fret over thunder. It is not threatened by gail winds or tumultuous rains. The sun knows its strength. In us exists the same strength. But we must fight our false ego to find that knowing.

We are all enough. We are all good. We are all connected to divinity, and there is no separateness between us. Vanity keeps us competing and believing others are either more worthy or less worthy than we. It is nonsense. The soul is a soul.

Social experiments have proven that there can be no growth when there is fear. When a mind is in fear, its natural instinct is to protect itself from its perceived attackers. Where there is fear, there can be no growth. When the mind is flooded with stress hormones, bodily functions are impaired, slowed and harmony halted.

The freedom to choose exists.

In us all, in any moment is the ability to let go; to detach and to surrender willingly and consciously to the laws of the universe. What will be will be regardless of our attachment to fear, anxiety and our disconnection with nature. We cannot control others, their wills, their circumstances or their actions. We cannot control what lessons life teaches whom or what situations are used to teach them.

Does your mind embrace this reality, or refuse it?

If our minds are fighting constantly; in fear continually, it cannot survive. Letting go and believing in a natural order of the universe is the key to survival. Consciously dodging fear, anxiety, and attachment to things outside of us, is the road to inner peace amidst duress. It is the way towards light and towards the healing of the world.

War exists because of fear. Because the mind of man fears others, it swarms itself in baths of defense. We fight because of illusions; disruptions in harmony; in truth and in nature.

There is nothing to fear at our core. A world free of the false ego, is world where only peace can exist.

Such a global reality is attainable, but not first without it existing in the confines of mans mind first.

Healing What Was So We Can Accept What Is

Yesterday I returned home from a trip to Puerto RIco. While there I met an interesting soul that will forever stay a part of mine. Joe is 87 years old, and he is as spry as any teenager I have ever known.

We met by accident, or should I say, by God's will, one warm night by the hotel pool. He was quick witted, charming, and enjoyed bringing smiles to our faces. His eyes were a dazzling pale Caribbean blue. His hair was as white as bleached cotton, and his skin was the color of a coconut hide. He spoke of trips to Fiji, Venice and Honolulu. His eyes burst like a fireworks display as he shared stories of his adventures. Joe's feet had covered more of this earth's bounty than anyone I had ever met. But I couldn't help but wonder where Joe called home.

We divinely met Joe for breakfast the next morning. Over our three hour meal, a deeper understanding in me grew for my new friend. His fortune had come with a high price. Estranged from his children and first wife, sorrow could not help but bleed through his words when his mind looked back and recalled his shadows of memories in which in them he stood as daddy before his babies. And in spite of his children's anger towards their father today, Joe's face could net conceal the joy fatherhood once bestowed him.

Today Joe is a world traveler, sharing meals and stories with people he meets in hotel lobbies, elevators, and gift shops. He is a man who superficially seems to have it all. But soon during our third meal together, my soul knew better.

Dear Joe is in search of something no pristine beach, or rushing waterfall could ever give him. There is no corner of earth far enough away from where Joe needs to go.

I may not know Joe very well, but I know him. He is me, and I am he.

Both born into families that unconsciously conditioned us to believe that self worth was something that could only be found 'out there' somewhere, whether through financial success, beauty, popularity or the subject of envy, Joe and I were robbed of a sense of 'home' right where we are. When we should have been being taught that our worth was in being and in self acceptance, we were taught that we weren't enough unless we had 'things', made others happy, and in essence were programmed to believe that what other people thought about us was more important than what we thought about us.

In life we developed ways to control acceptance out of others in an attempt to complete the cycle of dysfunctional programming. Our end goal was to feel acceptance because this was our interpretation of love. "If people accept me, then I am worthy...then I am lovable."

Unfortunately this cycles can go in more than one direction. One mind with such programming also unconsciously believes; "If I disappoint people and don't do what they want, then they won't love me; then I am not worthy; then I am not lovable."

This unconscious cycle is the reason we run, abuse alcohol, have affairs, idolize material goods, and sabotage relationships that might have survived had our programming been based more in love than in fear.

Joe however is on his way back home. He is nourishing his mind with great authors of enlightenment and is creating the energy to attract minds like my own. He is learning that control is and always has been an illusion. Joe never could manipulate love out of anyone, or get them to do what he thought they should do no matter what he bought them, or how much money he gave them. In the end, Joe sees truth. You cannot buy real love because perfect love is priceless...We can however buy emotional band aids that ease temporary bleeding that has been caused by faulty childhood programming, but one day the hemorrhage comes.

My hemorrhage has come and it has gone, and in its wake a cleansing has taken place. The road back to me was a long one, paved by many losses, including financial, material, physical and at times spiritual. But in my recovery, my road was cleared, and a path illuminated.

My journey home to "self" demanded I go back to what once was so I could learn to accept what now is. You cannot heal cancer by treating an ear infection. You must first address the primary disease if the whole being is to be ultimately saved.

My prayer is Joe learns to listen more to his own thoughts, and develops the skill to observe the mind rather than judge it.

In those quiet moments the past is revealed.

With diligence it is possible to heal faulty programming and lay ground work for new self loving, self accepting and self reliable thoughts. But it takes practice, patience and a belief in ones self to get there...but when you have been taught to disown your self the entirety of your life, that job is a hell of a lot tougher than one might think....

But then again..Joe is no ordinary man...