It snowed here in NY today. The sky was a light grey, and the roads were covered with a thin layer of slick powdered looking ice. The snow that fell from the sky was heavy and wet. Snowflakes fell to the ground quickly, almost as if they were racing one another. Between each swipe of my windshield wiper blades, my visibility was easily obscured.
My daughter Lisa sat buckled in the backseat, as she chatted about her day at school and all the happenings of her very dramatic 6th grade day. I listened; laughed; listened and added my mommy two cents whenever she dared to take a breath. As I approached the corner of the block we live on, a small child of perhaps 2 yrs of age, broke free from his mothers busy arms and darted directly in front of my car.
It was if I died for a moment, as I swerved to the right to avoid running this innocent little being over with my SUV. Lisa raised her arms and screamed, " Mom watch out for the baby". The childs mother let out a sound that I will never be able to release from my minds ear. It was the sound of doom, grief, horror and regret. It was the groan of a mother, almost certain her child would be hurt, as she watched powerless to stop the momentum of the idealic disastrous circumstances that might take her babies life.
I did not hit this child, although only inches separated my life from his. If I had not had to stop at that last red light, perhaps our paths may have crossed, sadly.
No tragedy took place this afternoon. In fact the circumstances were miraculous in my opinion. Yes, I know this to be true, but I can't help but feel shaken by them nonetheless. I could have killed that child. I could have. I honestly could have, and that thought sobers me from any nonsense that may have been swirling about in my mind today. In one second, or perhaps two or three, my priorities reorganized themselves.
I sit here almost compelled to watch the marathon of snowflakes that pass outside my bedroom window, wondering, what have I done with my life? I find myself in deep appreciation for the simplicity that defines my everyday. I know now, more clearer than an hour before, that life is meant to be lived happily, morally, and passionately. I am thankful for the lack of drama, noise and meaninglessness, yet know I must work diligently at staying consciously aware of the thoughts in my head.
This child woke me up! This tiny bundle of blue helped me become more aware, conscious and oh so grateful.