Mothers often feel the most jilted when one of their children has gone astray. Regardless of what has called the child to wander, whether it be drugs or some other type of rebellious behavior, mothers are too often frozen in time, hurt by the notion that in some way they have failed their child.
Freedom to choose is the most basic of all human needs. And when a being feels so powerless, whether that loss is the result of overbearing, neurotic, anxious, needy, well intended parents or is the result of feeling as if the world is a frightening place, sometimes beings will seek the 'freedom' to experience negative situations, knowing the very thing they are experiences is not good for them.
It is not about the 'thing' (drug or alcohol). Instead it is about the freedom to choose something in their life, the others in their life cannot control. And because beings feel the need to 'hide or do bad things' like drugs, the secrecy involved in the behavior adds to the illusion of 'freedom'. You cannot control a child's drug habit, if you do not know about it.
And a mother cannot lose herself in deeper feelings of powerlessness if she does not know her child has a drug habit. Nor can she burden her child emotionally with blame for her feelings of powerlessness.
Mothers who are enabling in nature, whether that be to the men in their lives, or to others, send negative messages to their children.
Mothers without clear outlined boundaries leave their children with a sense of insecurity and powerlessness.
Mothers who do not know who they are, who come off like doormats for the people in their lives, transfer that sense of powerlessness to their children, and thus rob them of a strong sense of self.
And while no mother is ever responsible for a drug a child shoots in his/her veins, a mother who does not exemplify strong boundaries, emits to her children the notion, the idea that her life is no longer about choices. A mother without boundaries is a woman that is seen by the world as well as her children, a woman who no longer believes in her freedom.
Enabling mothers are confused.
Overly nice, people pleasing mothers, who think the world will love them more if they never speak up, draw a boundary line or say 'no', teach their children to disempower themselves.
Because enabling mothers are ego fear based, they are often overwhelmed in crisis, and are unfortunately ill equipped to be the voice of wisdom and strength their child needs most in such times.
“A Mother who radiates self-love and self-acceptance actually VACCINATES her daughter against low self-esteem. ”
― Naomi Wolf
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Troubled Relationships
We've all been there. We have all been in a relationship with someone we truly care about, but continually find ourselves fighting or arguing over the same things. We know we are right. We know the other person is wrong, and we dig our heels in until the other person finally gives in and sees things our way. We think we have won.
At the core of all human beings is the desire for freedom. We all crave the freedom to think what we think and feel what we feel. The problem is, that when we love someone, often times we think that person is supposed to believe what we believe. We falsely presume that if someone else claims to love us, that means that person should at all times give into what we are saying, and furthermore put our needs above their own.
Married couples find themselves in these dilemma's often. She thinks he should want to give the kids baths at the end of the day, and he thinks she should understand he's been working all day and shouldn't have to bathe the kids at night. She thinks he should give up softball to spend more time with her, and he thinks she should be happy he enjoys his time alone doing something he loves.
The real dilemma arises when each person fundamentally believes in right and wrong. She assumes she's right, and unless he buckles and agrees with her, she feel shunned or maybe even unloved. She falsely believes his love is tied to whether or not he is able to see all aspects of life through her eyes.
When authentic love is present, there is no bullying. In fact, when you are lucky enough to be in a relationship with your twin flame, there is no need for bullying. Because the two souls are so much alike in their emotional make up, battles like the ones above are unnecessary.
The key to life is understanding. No one has to change for you, nor do you have to change for others.
Avoiding labeling behavior in others as good or bad, right or wrong is crucial. Everyone has a right to do and be what they want, even if you don't agree. Whatever it is someone else is doing that you don't like, may not be a choice you would have chosen. That however, does not make you right and others wrong. It simply means someone else is exercising their right of freedom, to be who they are.
Self righteous, ego based thinking is at the root of most troubled relationships.
If you cannot accept others behaviors, you may need to put distance between you and them.
Other people are not wrong, but they may be wrong for you. It seems like a subtle difference, but in actuality, it will make all the difference.
If you find yourself arguing over the same kinds of problems, either agree to disagree, or move on. Find someone who thinks more like you do, and the arguments fade away.
Dig your heels in and fixate on changing someone enough that they always see things your way, ensures that resentment will build.
At the core of all human beings is the desire for freedom. We all crave the freedom to think what we think and feel what we feel. The problem is, that when we love someone, often times we think that person is supposed to believe what we believe. We falsely presume that if someone else claims to love us, that means that person should at all times give into what we are saying, and furthermore put our needs above their own.
Married couples find themselves in these dilemma's often. She thinks he should want to give the kids baths at the end of the day, and he thinks she should understand he's been working all day and shouldn't have to bathe the kids at night. She thinks he should give up softball to spend more time with her, and he thinks she should be happy he enjoys his time alone doing something he loves.
The real dilemma arises when each person fundamentally believes in right and wrong. She assumes she's right, and unless he buckles and agrees with her, she feel shunned or maybe even unloved. She falsely believes his love is tied to whether or not he is able to see all aspects of life through her eyes.
When authentic love is present, there is no bullying. In fact, when you are lucky enough to be in a relationship with your twin flame, there is no need for bullying. Because the two souls are so much alike in their emotional make up, battles like the ones above are unnecessary.
The key to life is understanding. No one has to change for you, nor do you have to change for others.
Avoiding labeling behavior in others as good or bad, right or wrong is crucial. Everyone has a right to do and be what they want, even if you don't agree. Whatever it is someone else is doing that you don't like, may not be a choice you would have chosen. That however, does not make you right and others wrong. It simply means someone else is exercising their right of freedom, to be who they are.
Self righteous, ego based thinking is at the root of most troubled relationships.
If you cannot accept others behaviors, you may need to put distance between you and them.
Other people are not wrong, but they may be wrong for you. It seems like a subtle difference, but in actuality, it will make all the difference.
If you find yourself arguing over the same kinds of problems, either agree to disagree, or move on. Find someone who thinks more like you do, and the arguments fade away.
Dig your heels in and fixate on changing someone enough that they always see things your way, ensures that resentment will build.
Enablers And The Law of Attraction
Enablers are those who give off a certain vibration that draws into their experience those who need to be saved, or rescued in some way.
Like magnets, enablers attract those individuals that drain them mentally, physically, spiritually and sometimes financially.
Because enablers are blind to themselves and their own wounded self image, they are often times bewildered by the circumstances they have created.
They are confused by how it is they continually attract others who wind up taking advantage of them. They complain about their situations, the people they claim to love, and blame situations and people for why they can't move on, get ahead, or be happy.
Enablers are attracting into their experience what they desire. Because they desire to be taken care of by others, they attract those whom need to be taken care of.
The paradox for any enabler is this. The goal, they think, is to get the other person to take responsibility for their life in some area. All the while the enabler 'says' this is what they want for the other, he/she is taking part in enabling behavior of some kind. Maybe the enabler is giving the other person money, or a place to live. Maybe the enabler is covering up a drug problem. Maybe the enabler is doing for the other what the other must learn to do for themselves.
Enablers 'give off' one message consciously, but emit a different message on a vibrational level.
In order to stop enabling others, enablers first need to learn to take care of themselves on every level.
You cannot attract healthy love, when you do not love or respect your own self. If you haven't figured out how to look in the mirror and embrace the magnificent being that is staring back at you, you are mistaken if you think you can ever love anyone else enough to teach them to take care of themselves.
When you go out into this world empty, you get that in return; more emptiness.
Instead, when you go within, detach from the opinions of others, and learn to connect to the divine source that lies within you as well as every creation, you learn to fill yourself with the power that creates universes.
And when you finally love you, you begin to realize that anyone who does not mirror back to you the same consideration, and respect you bestow upon them, is not your equal.
You also learn to appreciate time, and grow in patience. For what you are inside, you manifest on the outside.
The more you love you, the more you are able to attract one who loves you as much in return.
Don't ever try to love anyone, unless you have first learned to love the divine being you are!
Namaste...
Like magnets, enablers attract those individuals that drain them mentally, physically, spiritually and sometimes financially.
Because enablers are blind to themselves and their own wounded self image, they are often times bewildered by the circumstances they have created.
They are confused by how it is they continually attract others who wind up taking advantage of them. They complain about their situations, the people they claim to love, and blame situations and people for why they can't move on, get ahead, or be happy.
Enablers are attracting into their experience what they desire. Because they desire to be taken care of by others, they attract those whom need to be taken care of.
The paradox for any enabler is this. The goal, they think, is to get the other person to take responsibility for their life in some area. All the while the enabler 'says' this is what they want for the other, he/she is taking part in enabling behavior of some kind. Maybe the enabler is giving the other person money, or a place to live. Maybe the enabler is covering up a drug problem. Maybe the enabler is doing for the other what the other must learn to do for themselves.
Enablers 'give off' one message consciously, but emit a different message on a vibrational level.
In order to stop enabling others, enablers first need to learn to take care of themselves on every level.
You cannot attract healthy love, when you do not love or respect your own self. If you haven't figured out how to look in the mirror and embrace the magnificent being that is staring back at you, you are mistaken if you think you can ever love anyone else enough to teach them to take care of themselves.
When you go out into this world empty, you get that in return; more emptiness.
Instead, when you go within, detach from the opinions of others, and learn to connect to the divine source that lies within you as well as every creation, you learn to fill yourself with the power that creates universes.
And when you finally love you, you begin to realize that anyone who does not mirror back to you the same consideration, and respect you bestow upon them, is not your equal.
You also learn to appreciate time, and grow in patience. For what you are inside, you manifest on the outside.
The more you love you, the more you are able to attract one who loves you as much in return.
Don't ever try to love anyone, unless you have first learned to love the divine being you are!
Namaste...
Thursday, January 19, 2012
Now Is Then, Tomorrow Is Now/The Law of Attraction
Your current physical reality is the result of all the thoughts you have created in your past.
Your tomorrows will manifest what thoughts you are experiencing now.
The power then only ever is in the moment of the here and the now.
Creating the life you desire will depend on how long you can keep your attention on the objects of your desires; the ones that have yet to manifest.
When beings become one with the vibration of their current negative realities, they cement themselves to that current point in time, and thus hold themselves away from where they truly want to be.
It is not the easiest thing in the world to do.
It is not easy to desire love, when those around you are not loving.
But in order to experience the things in life you desire, it is necessary to first become a vibrational match for that which you desire.
If you want to feel good in the future, you first must feel good now.
This requires a decision to ignore what is now, while staying emotionally focused on where you want to be in the same moment.
What you are thinking, or pondering now...is drawing to it through the powerful law of attraction, like energy, whether you believe this law to be true or not.
Like energies always attract more like energies. This law is the very basis for the body you live in, the reality you have created, and for the universe you exist in.
Your tomorrows will manifest what thoughts you are experiencing now.
The power then only ever is in the moment of the here and the now.
Creating the life you desire will depend on how long you can keep your attention on the objects of your desires; the ones that have yet to manifest.
When beings become one with the vibration of their current negative realities, they cement themselves to that current point in time, and thus hold themselves away from where they truly want to be.
It is not the easiest thing in the world to do.
It is not easy to desire love, when those around you are not loving.
But in order to experience the things in life you desire, it is necessary to first become a vibrational match for that which you desire.
If you want to feel good in the future, you first must feel good now.
This requires a decision to ignore what is now, while staying emotionally focused on where you want to be in the same moment.
What you are thinking, or pondering now...is drawing to it through the powerful law of attraction, like energy, whether you believe this law to be true or not.
Like energies always attract more like energies. This law is the very basis for the body you live in, the reality you have created, and for the universe you exist in.
Monday, January 16, 2012
To The Enlightened; How To Avoid Frustration In 2012
Man is evolving. For those of us who have done the work, we understand at an unconscious as well as conscious level that the awareness of man is expanding.
As 2012 approaches, great shifts in our ever expanding universe will occur, and are occurring as we speak. The universe was once a minute, compacted 'thing'. Over billions and billions of years, it has expanded into our galaxy, equipped with various planets, moons, stars and galactic 'stuff'.
Whether mankind awakens to the truths of the universe or not, does not alter the fact that this universe is in fact expanding, in the physical sense. Nothing in our universe is what it was 5 billion or 10 billion years ago. Nor is the mind of man what it was 200,000 years ago.
While modern science argues with itself about how, why, and where 'man' originated, the absolute truth is, man's consciousness of his very self is evolving.
What your mind is today, is not what it was 5 years ago, nor will it be in one year what it is in this very moment. This is an example of the human consciousness and its ever expanding understanding of its self.
For those who consider themselves 'awakened' and who diligently seek to facilitate their conscious understanding of the universe and their place in it, it can sometimes be frustrating when having to deal with beings who are not as awakened or as interested in the expansion of consciousness.
As 2012 approaches, and as new waves of naturally 'open minded' children are being born into this 'newer earth' it will become increasingly more difficult for closed minded beings to exist harmoniously on this planet. The old ways of thinking are crumbling. No longer is the majority believing that 'money' is the key to happiness. For those who are deeply rooted in ideas of the material, or in the fantasy that happiness is something only someone else can bring them, the new shifts of 2012 will prove only more confusing a time for them.
Those who are closed minded, and unwilling or unable to think in new ways, will discover that their world is a source of constant confusion. They will experience more disharmony than ever before as the universe shifts.
Those beings who instead seek self awareness, enlightenment, and personal bliss through the aligning with source, will transition well into 2012.
My personal quest for harmony and understanding has never been so intense. I can feel the beat of the earth rifling for 'something more'. As the universe expands, so too will the mind of man. For those lucky enough to be aware of this global shift in consciousness, the upcoming shifts in our universe will be a welcoming experience. For those unable to keep up with the rapid changes in thoughts ahead, the shifts will present them with only more confusion, bewilderment, and pain.
The only way through the upcoming changes, is through ones own soul. Love is the vessel man needs to carry him through to this next phase of human existence.
For enlightened beings, the upcoming shifts in universal consciousness may prove to be challenging. For as you grow in your understanding, and those whom you know dig their heels into their old patterns of thoughts, it can be quite frustrating. While you love your family and friends, unless they open their minds to what is happening on a cosmic level, you will undoubtedly witness their struggles, all the while holding the key to their freedom as they push your hand away.
A learning being myself, one who appreciates just how little I know, and how much I still need to learn, I am beginning to understand more fully my place in this universe.
Love has been the only medicine I have ever needed to heal.
With all the unpleasant experiences I have endured, it was always the love of self that soothed my soul.
When others judged, criticized, mocked, or abandoned me, in the end it was the connecting to my source, my higher power and my soul that healed my pain.
As 2012 approaches, and my appreciation for love of self expands even greater, and as my personal harmony aligns itself even deeper with source, the contrast between me and those I love who are not in alignment with their source will widen.
It is here in this space between the enlightened, and the unenlightened that even more love is required.
I am discovering that my desire to help facilitate others personal growth is not always a welcomed thing. I have been viewed as self righteous, and arrogant. In truth, it is only love that has ever propelled me to offer my understanding of this new time to those I love. But it is truer still, that others journeys are not my business.
Today, I am learning to know what I know, to use what I know, and to live what I know to the best of my ability. I am learning to love and appreciate more my own self, and my own personal journey and to instead teach more by example than through the offering of what I have come to know.
I am learning that very often people don't want to learn. Instead they want to vent.
They don't want to change. They want others to change for them.
They don't want to learn. They just want to discharge some of their negative energy into the lap of someone else.
And this is fine. However, I do not have to take on other people's stuff. I do not have to expect others to change, nor do I have to change for others.
My quest today and for all those who share the same desire for deeper understanding for the sake of the expansion of human consciousness, is that these words bless you today...
Love of self, and of others must continually be our focus. And when others mock you in their unknowing of what you know, love them deeper still. For when others see lack in you, it is merely a reflection of the lack they refuse to see in themselves. Only love can heal hearts, homes, relationships, and ultimately our world.
Namaste...
As 2012 approaches, great shifts in our ever expanding universe will occur, and are occurring as we speak. The universe was once a minute, compacted 'thing'. Over billions and billions of years, it has expanded into our galaxy, equipped with various planets, moons, stars and galactic 'stuff'.
Whether mankind awakens to the truths of the universe or not, does not alter the fact that this universe is in fact expanding, in the physical sense. Nothing in our universe is what it was 5 billion or 10 billion years ago. Nor is the mind of man what it was 200,000 years ago.
While modern science argues with itself about how, why, and where 'man' originated, the absolute truth is, man's consciousness of his very self is evolving.
What your mind is today, is not what it was 5 years ago, nor will it be in one year what it is in this very moment. This is an example of the human consciousness and its ever expanding understanding of its self.
For those who consider themselves 'awakened' and who diligently seek to facilitate their conscious understanding of the universe and their place in it, it can sometimes be frustrating when having to deal with beings who are not as awakened or as interested in the expansion of consciousness.
As 2012 approaches, and as new waves of naturally 'open minded' children are being born into this 'newer earth' it will become increasingly more difficult for closed minded beings to exist harmoniously on this planet. The old ways of thinking are crumbling. No longer is the majority believing that 'money' is the key to happiness. For those who are deeply rooted in ideas of the material, or in the fantasy that happiness is something only someone else can bring them, the new shifts of 2012 will prove only more confusing a time for them.
Those who are closed minded, and unwilling or unable to think in new ways, will discover that their world is a source of constant confusion. They will experience more disharmony than ever before as the universe shifts.
Those beings who instead seek self awareness, enlightenment, and personal bliss through the aligning with source, will transition well into 2012.
My personal quest for harmony and understanding has never been so intense. I can feel the beat of the earth rifling for 'something more'. As the universe expands, so too will the mind of man. For those lucky enough to be aware of this global shift in consciousness, the upcoming shifts in our universe will be a welcoming experience. For those unable to keep up with the rapid changes in thoughts ahead, the shifts will present them with only more confusion, bewilderment, and pain.
The only way through the upcoming changes, is through ones own soul. Love is the vessel man needs to carry him through to this next phase of human existence.
For enlightened beings, the upcoming shifts in universal consciousness may prove to be challenging. For as you grow in your understanding, and those whom you know dig their heels into their old patterns of thoughts, it can be quite frustrating. While you love your family and friends, unless they open their minds to what is happening on a cosmic level, you will undoubtedly witness their struggles, all the while holding the key to their freedom as they push your hand away.
A learning being myself, one who appreciates just how little I know, and how much I still need to learn, I am beginning to understand more fully my place in this universe.
Love has been the only medicine I have ever needed to heal.
With all the unpleasant experiences I have endured, it was always the love of self that soothed my soul.
When others judged, criticized, mocked, or abandoned me, in the end it was the connecting to my source, my higher power and my soul that healed my pain.
As 2012 approaches, and my appreciation for love of self expands even greater, and as my personal harmony aligns itself even deeper with source, the contrast between me and those I love who are not in alignment with their source will widen.
It is here in this space between the enlightened, and the unenlightened that even more love is required.
I am discovering that my desire to help facilitate others personal growth is not always a welcomed thing. I have been viewed as self righteous, and arrogant. In truth, it is only love that has ever propelled me to offer my understanding of this new time to those I love. But it is truer still, that others journeys are not my business.
Today, I am learning to know what I know, to use what I know, and to live what I know to the best of my ability. I am learning to love and appreciate more my own self, and my own personal journey and to instead teach more by example than through the offering of what I have come to know.
I am learning that very often people don't want to learn. Instead they want to vent.
They don't want to change. They want others to change for them.
They don't want to learn. They just want to discharge some of their negative energy into the lap of someone else.
And this is fine. However, I do not have to take on other people's stuff. I do not have to expect others to change, nor do I have to change for others.
My quest today and for all those who share the same desire for deeper understanding for the sake of the expansion of human consciousness, is that these words bless you today...
Love of self, and of others must continually be our focus. And when others mock you in their unknowing of what you know, love them deeper still. For when others see lack in you, it is merely a reflection of the lack they refuse to see in themselves. Only love can heal hearts, homes, relationships, and ultimately our world.
Namaste...
Friday, January 13, 2012
Become What You See In Your Minds Eye First
Before you can have it, you must see it...
Before you can become it, you must feel it first...
Before you are to have love, you must love your self...
Before you are to be prosperous, you must feel prosperous...
Before you are to be thin, you must see, feel, and behave as you believe a thin you would behave...
Before you can have any 'thing' you first must see, and feel it in your imagination...
Staying stuck in the past, only brings more of the past into your 'now'...
Not tuning into 'you' is liken to living life walking backwards...
Before you can become it, you must feel it first...
Before you are to have love, you must love your self...
Before you are to be prosperous, you must feel prosperous...
Before you are to be thin, you must see, feel, and behave as you believe a thin you would behave...
Before you can have any 'thing' you first must see, and feel it in your imagination...
Staying stuck in the past, only brings more of the past into your 'now'...
Not tuning into 'you' is liken to living life walking backwards...
Monday, January 9, 2012
Changing DNA Patterns
For those who are not so understanding of the idea that beings are vibratory creatures who consistently send out invisible information to other beings by way of energy patterns, it will not be so easy to accept that 'dysfunctional family patterns-behaviors-ideas' are, at their core encoded vibratory patterns that have been encoded on DNA.
Human beings cells respond to vibrations received by the brain. The brain receives information from what the heart 'feels on a vibrational level' and the heart receives information from the pulse of the earth, also known in the scientific field as the circadian rhythm.
DNA responds to vibrational patterns. Those of us who have been born from angry, depressed, addicted, closed minded, controlling families, have received faulty negative 'programming'.
It will help us to heal our selves, if we begin thinking about our healing processes in terms of negative DNA coding. Diseases are genetically past on from one generation to the next as the result of long term exposure to low vibrational patterns.
Low vibrational patterns of fear, anger, envy, self pity, anxiety, self hate, addictions and obsessions, do not allow our bodies to 'turn on' as many strands of DNA as possible.
High vibrational frequency patterns like love, compassion, empathy, and understanding allow many more DNA strands to become activated.
Breaking addictions in this lifetime, help free beings as well as future generations.
By learning to conquer what has been done to us by past generations, we help build a better future.
Human beings cells respond to vibrations received by the brain. The brain receives information from what the heart 'feels on a vibrational level' and the heart receives information from the pulse of the earth, also known in the scientific field as the circadian rhythm.
DNA responds to vibrational patterns. Those of us who have been born from angry, depressed, addicted, closed minded, controlling families, have received faulty negative 'programming'.
It will help us to heal our selves, if we begin thinking about our healing processes in terms of negative DNA coding. Diseases are genetically past on from one generation to the next as the result of long term exposure to low vibrational patterns.
Low vibrational patterns of fear, anger, envy, self pity, anxiety, self hate, addictions and obsessions, do not allow our bodies to 'turn on' as many strands of DNA as possible.
High vibrational frequency patterns like love, compassion, empathy, and understanding allow many more DNA strands to become activated.
Breaking addictions in this lifetime, help free beings as well as future generations.
By learning to conquer what has been done to us by past generations, we help build a better future.
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