Monday, March 26, 2012

Co Dependency Is Ruining Your Life

Co dependency is rampant in our society--perhaps even in the world.

From divorces to disease, ( dis-ease ), we are a people confused by what our true purpose here on this planet is about.

When we teach our children to worry more about what the neighbors think about our family than what they think about themselves, we are teaching them to disown themselves and to give up their right to stay connected to their 'self'.

When we buy things we cannot afford with the intent to impress others or to appear as if we have more money than we actually do--because we worry about what others think about us--we disown our selves, with the notions that what we insanely, 'think others think about us' is more important than being honest about our money situation even to ourselves, we are recreating co dependent pathways in our brains.

When we date people who are not good for us, because they 'look' good or have money, we disown our higher purpose for peace and happiness for the sake of the ego, which falsely has us believing that what others think about us is more important than what we think about ourselves.

When we stay in relationships with people who are dysfunctional because we believe we will eventually change them, and thus one day find ourselves feeling good about ourselves because our sick partner finally saw the light, we are giving into co dependent mind sets that ultimately disconnects us from our true selves, and our source.

When we worry more about the people in our lives who worry nothing about us, we teach them that what they think about us is more important than what we think about us, we are contributing to co dependent thinking.

And when we good natured co dependents who think we are out to save the world, expect the world to change because we think we know better, we are essentially forcing our self righteous wants on others, rather than accepting others for who they are...

And when we act like the martyrs we tell ourselves we are, we are behaving in a dysfunctional co dependent way and blaming others for our personal misery...

If the world is to finally find that peace we all come into this world seeking, then the world at large will need to let go of the notions that others have to be what and who we want them to be.

If you are to find inner peace then you must learn to practice on the field of your own mind the art of allowing.

Your work here on this planet has nothing to do with gaining material things...although many beings would argue that point.

Beings want material things not for the material thing, but for the 'feeling' that material thing will bring.

It is not the car you are after. It is the 'feeling' you believe the car will bring you.

We are all in search of a 'specific feeling or state of being'. We all say we want happiness, but many of us fail to acknowledge that our happiness has absolutely NOTHING to do with others.

A state of happiness is a practiced state of being. Happiness and peace are emotional vibrational states that once found and mastered, one learns to accept that others do not have to be, do or think like they do in order to stay in alignment with who they are.

In time and space this may seem to some as selfishness, and in some ways it is. But it can be no other way. Your life is not your life if your mind is under the illusion that your purpose is to worry more about others happiness than your own.

The key is to allow others to be who they are, even if who they are you disagree with.

The key is to not do the things that will cause chains of events that will disrupt your life.

The key is to appreciate peace, and happiness and those who bring more of those experiences your way, and to begin to turn away from those who do not.

The key is to let go of those who drain you out of love, and to allow them to play out their dysfunctional patterns without your interference. They'll get to where they need to go a whole lot faster without you telling them how you think they should live their life.

The key is to not get too far pulled out of alignment when the storms come, so that you can be like a beacon of light, rather than darkened by it all.

Your purpose here on earth is simple...be happy...mind your own business...let others be who they want to be...and still be happy...

Namaste...

No comments:

Post a Comment

Thank you for visiting my site which was created to help heal adult children of alcoholics, codependents, those suffering from codependency issues, as well as all beings suffering from low self esteem, and who seek validation from outside rather from within.

Know--you are enough!

Lisa A. Romano
healingselfesteem@gmail.com